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Adult Attachment Test: Discover Your Relational Style

Gildas GarrecCBT Psychopractitioner
7 min read

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In brief: Identify your adult attachment style (secure, anxious, avoidant, disorganized). Understand your relational patterns for calmer bonds.

Why do some people live their romantic relationships with serenity, while others oscillate between abandonment anxiety and need for distance? The answer lies in a concept developed by psychiatrist John Bowlby in the 1960s, then refined by Mary Ainsworth: attachment theory.

Long confined to child psychology, this theory was extended to adult relationships by the work of Cindy Hazan and Phillip Shaver in 1987. Their research showed that attachment patterns formed in childhood continue to influence our intimate relationships in adulthood. The good news: these patterns are not fixed. Identifying them is the first step to transforming them.

Why take an adult attachment test

An adult attachment test lets you understand your automatic reactions in your intimate relationships. It is not a clinical diagnosis, but a tool for self-knowledge that sheds light on several aspects of your relational functioning:

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  • Your reactions to intimacy: do you seek closeness or flee it?
  • Your handling of separation: does your partner's absence generate anxiety or relief?
  • Your relational expectations: are they realistic or colored by old patterns?
  • Your defense mechanisms: what behaviors do you adopt when you feel threatened in the relationship?
In CBT, identifying your attachment style allows you to spot the automatic thoughts and cognitive patterns that sabotage the relationship. A patient with anxious attachment will think, for example, "If he doesn't answer right away, it means he doesn't love me anymore" — a classic cognitive distortion of mind-reading.

The 4 adult attachment styles

Contemporary research identifies four main attachment styles, defined along two axes: anxiety (fear of abandonment) and avoidance (discomfort with intimacy).

Secure attachment

The secure style concerns about 50 to 60% of the adult population. Secure individuals are comfortable with intimacy and interdependence. They express their needs without excessive fear of rejection and tolerate disagreements without questioning the relationship.

Main characteristics:

  • Trust in the partner's availability

  • Ability to communicate emotions directly

  • Balance between autonomy and connection

  • Constructive conflict management


Anxious (or preoccupied) attachment

About 20 to 25% of adults show anxious attachment. This style is characterized by relational hypervigilance: the person constantly scrutinizes signs of interest or disinterest from their partner.

Main characteristics:

  • Intense fear of abandonment

  • Constant need for reassurance

  • Tendency to interpret ambiguous signals negatively

  • Strong emotional reactivity during conflicts


Avoidant (or dismissing) attachment

Avoidant attachment concerns about 20% of the adult population. These people value their independence to the point of maintaining emotional distance, even in intimate relationships.

Main characteristics:

  • Discomfort with emotional intimacy

  • Tendency to minimize the importance of relationships

  • Difficulty expressing emotions and needs

  • Withdrawal from the partner's affective demands


Disorganized (or fearful) attachment

The disorganized style, present in 5 to 10% of adults, combines elements of anxiety and avoidance. It is often associated with traumatic experiences in childhood.

Main characteristics:

  • Oscillation between desire for closeness and fear of intimacy

  • Contradictory behaviors in the relationship

  • Difficulty regulating emotions

  • Tendency to repeat painful relational patterns


How to interpret the test results

The adult attachment test we offer assesses your positioning on the two fundamental axes: anxiety and avoidance. Here's how to read your results.

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High anxiety score, low avoidance

You show an anxious-preoccupied profile. You intensely seek closeness but constantly fear losing it. In CBT, work will focus on restructuring catastrophic thoughts linked to abandonment and developing tolerance for relational uncertainty.

High avoidance score, low anxiety

Your profile is avoidant-dismissing. You protect yourself from vulnerability by maintaining emotional distance. Therapeutic work will aim to identify core beliefs ("Counting on someone is dangerous") and progressively develop the ability to tolerate intimacy.

High scores on both axes

The disorganized-fearful profile indicates an internal conflict between the desire for connection and the fear of being hurt. Therapeutic support can help understand the origin of this conflict and build more secure relational patterns.

Low scores on both axes

This profile corresponds to secure attachment. You navigate your relationships with sufficient basic trust. This doesn't mean the absence of difficulties, but an ability to traverse them without questioning your worth or that of the relationship.

Can attachment style change?

This is one of the most frequent questions — and the answer is yes. Neuroscience research has demonstrated the plasticity of attachment patterns. Several factors favor this change:

Corrective relational experience: a relationship with a secure partner can progressively modify insecure attachment. This is what Bowlby called the "secure base." Psychotherapy: cognitive-behavioral approaches work specifically on dysfunctional relational patterns. By identifying automatic thoughts and avoidance or dependence behaviors, the patient develops new relational strategies. Self-knowledge: simply understanding your attachment style reduces automatic reactivity. When you recognize a reaction as stemming from your attachment pattern rather than objective reality, you gain freedom of choice.

Take the test now

Our adult attachment test comprises 30 questions developed from the scientific work of Brennan, Clark, and Shaver (1998). It assesses your positioning on the two fundamental dimensions — anxiety and avoidance — and provides you with a detailed profile with concrete evolution paths.

The test takes about 5 minutes. Results are immediate and free.

Take the attachment test now

Frequently asked questions

Is the attachment test reliable?

Our test relies on scientifically validated scales from Brennan, Clark, and Shaver's research. It provides a reliable indication of your predominant attachment style. For an in-depth assessment, a clinical evaluation with a professional remains recommended.

Is my attachment style the same in all my relationships?

Not necessarily. Attachment style can vary by partner and context. However, most people show a predominant style that manifests in the majority of their intimate relationships.

Can you have a secure attachment with an insecure partner?

Yes. Secure attachment involves a flexibility that allows adaptation to different partners. However, a relationship where both partners are insecure generally requires more substantial work to build healthy dynamics.

From what age can this test be taken?

The test is designed for adults who have had at least one significant intimate relationship experience. It is generally relevant from 18-20 years old.

What to do if my results indicate insecure attachment?

Insecure attachment is not a fate. It is valuable information that lets you understand your automatic reactions. If the results concern you, support with a CBT-specialized psychopractitioner can help you develop more secure attachment.

FAQ

Is this adult attachment test reliable without professional consultation?

Identify your adult attachment style (secure, anxious, avoidant, disorganized). The questionnaire rests on validated clinical criteria and constitutes a valuable first indicator, but it does not replace a clinical assessment by a mental health professional.

What to do if my score on the adult attachment test is high?

A high score indicates that consulting a CBT psychopractitioner or clinical psychologist may be useful. Validated protocols exist to support this type of difficulty, generally in 8 to 16 sessions.

How often should this test be redone to track evolution?

An interval of 4 to 8 weeks is recommended to observe significant changes. During therapy, your therapist will probably integrate regular measurements to evaluate progress objectively.

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About the author

Gildas Garrec · CBT Psychopractitioner

Certified practitioner in cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), author of 16 books on applied psychology and relationships. Over 900 clinical articles published across Psychologie et Sérénité.

📚 16 published books📝 900+ articles🎓 CBT certified